why i wont be buying your girl scout cookies.

It's not personal. really. They seem nice enough. what I find most creepy is the beaming mother standing next to you. why is she so proud of you? You really arent doing anything... what your doing requires no effort from you. You simply stand and bank on your cuteness or your brand to sell for you. wheres your business strategy? im not going to give you a free pass, a handout. Also, if asked simply why you were selling the cookies, for what cause, you couldnt answer the question. Because the selling of the cookies is not about where the money is going, or what fund they are benefitting. Its all about who's mommy can sell the most boxes of processed baked goods.
The side of the box states, "you'd be suprised what a girl scout cookie can build: strong values. strong minds. strong bodies. strong communities." wow, all that from thin mints?I guess I better get eating.

Deconstruction of Laurene

Laurene was the perfect candidate for this experience, because ive often thought of her as a deep thinker who could give me a few good answers before she was reduced to nothing. i stumbled in the house after work on sunday, slightly annoyed and very hungry. before i can make my way to the kitchen, laurene stops me and begins in on her latest harassment. she has decided we must go on a family trip this summer, me her and the boys, and she made the reservations. i shrug, as long as i dont have to camp, im fine. then she flashes me a mischevious look and asks what are my thoughts on air balloons. i stare blankly at her and my first reaction is to ask her why she is simply so odd. what are air balloons, i ask her. she stares at me with a confused look. oh you know what they are, those big balloons in the sky that you go on rides in. oh, right. so whats the sky? now shes obviously annoyed and restates her original question. i repeat mine. fine lauralee, i wont make you an air balloon ride reservation is her reaction. she stomps in her bedroom. i guess she dosent like it much more than i do?